So, when I first left the law practice and started this blog (almost 6 months ago), I experienced a strange surge of energy—one that I cannot seem to replicate again. I barely slept. I worked on my product, networked 24/7, sought out advisors, researched competitors, researched the market, read up on quora.com to learn Business 101 in a hurry, and I even stayed up late to work on herein blog.
So, what happened? Why did I ignore this blog?
First of all, as one would expect, I haven’t had alot of free time. The life of someone no longer answering to partners, clients and litigation deadlines is nevertheless filled with….well, deadlines. I answer to my business partners, advisors, and mostly, to myself.
You should know that before I quit law, I had these fantasies of doing all of the same activities as those sun-kissed rich women, who didn’t have to work for a living. I wanted to leisurely walk around in my yoga outfit, carrying around Starbucks drinks. They have oodles of time (you know the type I’m talking about!): jogging on the beach, yoga on the beach, biking on the beach…you get the idea. I live in LA so everything is glamorously done by the beach.
I envisioned that I, too, would have their happy glow of sunshine, their flow of warm lattes with soy milk, and their perfect, well-beauty-rested skin.
I thought, This is going to be awesome! I’m going get a great body, get healthy AND build a startup!”
The truth is that I don’t even start work until 12pm and it’s not because I’m joining those ladies on the beach. I don’t even fall asleep until after 3 or 4 a.m., and these days, it’s 6 a.m. I literally wake up, walk a few yards to my desk, and immediately start working.
So, what keeps me up at night?
This brings me to the next reason (and probably the real reason) I ignored this blog:
It’s easier to write about your accomplishments in a blog than your challenges.
I knew I had a young, female following of readers (small, but it was still a following nevertheless!) who enjoyed my previous blog entries, where I used references to shopping and fashion as a way to lighten the mood of both the blog and, in some ways, my own life. Alas, life as a cofounder is not just about trading in my Louboutins or strutting around in a black leather skirt at networking events.
The truth is that I traded in more than just my Louboutins.
I have traded in security and stability for frequent moments of chaos. This entrepreneurial world is so fast-paced that you literally have to build a new agenda, a new order everyday, while ensuring that your mission and vision remain intact. I have a whole new appreciation for the term “pivot.”
I would even say that I have traded in some level of freedom because this is like raising a baby. My needs come last. Every penny, thought, emotion, energy and love goes into my baby. There are no weekends. There are no babysitters. I give everything to this baby in hopes that she will not exhibit any of my previous mistakes as a lawyer, seeking affirmation from incorrigible sources.
I have a real job. I have real partners. I have real investors. I have real people counting on me for direction every day.
But here’s the hard truth…
My title at the company is “CEO,” but that doesn’t mean sh*t.
As my boyfriend (also a cofounder that sold his startup this week to AmEx) says, he’s the “COO, cofounder, AND the janitor.” It’s not easy because as cofounders we all struggle with raising capital, pitching to investors, finding programmers, growing traction, and so on. We do it all and there’s nothing glamorous about the work.
Despite all of these incredible new challenges, I would pick this path over and over again. This is not me complaining. This is me providing a more candid discussion on life as an ex-lawyer turned entrepreneur.
What about you? Are you bold enough to share your struggles to the public?